A VISIT TO REMEMBER

It was one of these  beautiful sunny mornings which Melbourne has the secret.  Everywhere
flowers were blossoming, birds were singing.   The little house was just in the corner  on my
right . It was smaller than the others and has been   constructed   so as to  meet the needs of the first italian emigrants.  It has a little  garden in front   and  behind  the house  so as to enable the occupier to grow some  fruits  and  vegetables .  The wooden door was hidden by numerous plants  growing near by.

                         The old chimney was still working  and smoke could be seen coming out.

The little gate was shaky and needed some repair. As I entered the yard, I felt a thrill. It seemed to me that I entered a world that needed to be discovered  and shared..  Wild herbs  have grown in between the pavements as well as  in  the  flower beds on each side.  Yet there were still  some beautiful flowers , witnesses of a better time , when a loving hand was taking care of them.

The whole garden was neglected.  However  the grass around  has been  cut not long ago. The orange tree was full of oranges , many fell on the ground  as there was nobody to pick them.  Children no longer ran in the yard  and  their  cries were no longer heard. The orange tree which was so necessary for maintaining the health of the family  during the cold winter  seemed useless then.

I knocked at the door,   and waited a bit,  as dragging feet slowly  came to let me in.   She was small, more than 90 years of age, all in black as  it is   usual  for  women  of this generation,  but  she was still strong for her age. Her face was large, not so wrinkled, with a strong chin. and tiny black eyes
like  sharp  pencils . Her hair silver grey and thick was  pulled back  behind , held with clips.
Her severe look  reminded me of my mother a teacher . Surely she was a woman of principles,
not to be meddled with..  But I liked her the more for this  and  carefully engaged in a candid and respectful  conversation. She did  not speak much  but she was  able to make herself understood.

 Our lady  gently introduced me into a small living room.  A big arm chair was in front of the TV,
 near the fire place.  It was there that  she spent most of the long hours of the day, as prolapsed
disks in her back made her suffer hell. Conversation  was a bit difficult, as her english had  such an accent.  Adapting herself  to another culture and language had not been easy for her. She  still remained  this girl who had left her village,  compelled by circumstances.

Because of my curious nature, I started to observe things around me. Every where, on the wall,
on shelves and top dressers, there were photos : photos of all her children from their birth,
their first holy communion,  their fifteenth birthday, their marriages and their children afterwards.
A cup of coffee in one hand, I was busy looking at them, and  I was not astonished, because
I did the same at home  on my little altar, as I want those I love to be protected and on the stairs as
I like to look at them and  remember  the happy days.  Sometime my husband would reproach me. Surely less photos  on the wall would  suit  my bedroom, but as a mother, I felt the need to have my children  near the heart of Jesus. So,  I think it is the same with my gentle lady.  Every  family   member was  special to her and she knew them all , though  I am sure , she did  not look at them frequently, she had all of  them   in mind when she did  her rosary  that  she kept at hand.

Except the main bedroom, around me every room was small , small living room, small dining room,
small kitchen, but it was warm with the presence  of the lady.  You wished to stay here and dream
about how it was when the children were there. A photo of  her handsome husband reminded me
of their love  story  and I was eager to know more.

Who is she ? ....  Where does she come from ?... From what part of Italy?...
Lipari , it  was the name of   a small island near Sicilia.

What memories !....

I could not prevent myself from questioning her more about her childhood.  She seemed to look
far away and told me about life at that time.  It was just at the beginning of the  first world war  .
Every body was poor  in Lipari as the economy was zero.  No tourists at that time.  The men were engaged  in war, so feeding the families was an affair of women. Transport  by sea  was
difficult and restricted as the danger of air attacks  and by sea  was   constant.

Consequently,  it was a dilemna .  Vegetables and fruits were insufficient.   As a child of twelve
years of age, she had the  responsibililty to cook for all the family.  She remembered plucking
young stem of wild herbs  outside and let them cook with potatoes. for a long time.  The latters
were not peeled, but brushed and allowed to  simmer all round the day  in a big cauldron,  to
thicken  the broth  and  keep  the vitamins.

As soon as  the alarms were triggered by  the  presence  of  an  enemy  near by, everybody fled
to the  caves and the mountains.   Electricity had not yet  reached the island.  The inhabitants
lived in fear of an attack.  Submarines were seen   from the shore.   By chance  Lipari was of  no interest to them.

When the war ended, and the men came back, there was no work for them , nothing .
They could not even afford  the necessary , so every body started to leave the island and migrate  to Europe, America and Australia.

She was now of age to be married, and when her future husband asked her to migrate to Melbourne, Australia, she did not hesitate one second.  She was ready for the big adventure, and  felt that she could face  any hardship.

Together with the first wave of immgration, she landed at Melbourne.  The english language was totally unknown to her, and she had to learn quickly.   Here also there was no electricity  . But she was a strong willed woman.

The sewing machine did not exist.  So she   hand sewed  the shirts, the trousers, costumes ,
dresses of her five children  with the light of a  petrol lamp. She was proud of it.

The Australians were  used to english food which was  very simple and  monotonous ,
and she had to show imagination to improve the daily menus .  It was at this time that she started
her  famous rice dumplings stuffed with mozarella .

Believe me, there is none like her to make them,  and even to day at each  event,  anniversary,
every body asks for her dumplings and they disappear very quickly from the plate. She also
has the secret of delicious  ginger , almond biscuits , but most important  she knows  how to make
simple and good  cooking.  Her daughter  has well  benefited from her  know how  and now she shows great cooking  skill in her every day life.

Oh ! The flavour of the Italian  plates. !...   The migrants   started to have their aromatic herbs,
their vegetable available on the market, such as basilic, oregano,  their coffee.,  their cheese :  mozarella, parmesan, their tomato paste, their pastas , their lasagns.  Others  made and  smoked  their hams, salamis, and mortadellas.  This changed the culinary  tradition of Australia for the best.

The Church  with its rituals was very important to the migrants , specially  the Italians  . I have
never seen so many churches any where else. Each village has its church according  to the creed of  its  inhabitants, its school, its community centre, retreat house for the seniors, its park , its shopping centre., every thing well admistered. and clean.

Her generation  was a faithful one, and  serving God has a meaning  for its folk. On Sundays,  the church is always full . Usually, after the ceremony, they  all join  together   for  a cup of  coffee and some  cakes .  So, they can have a chat and share.

The christian community is very  lively and busy  in organising events, helping  the poor of the
parish, the needy,  organising leisures  for young and old and  offering pilgrimages inside and  outside the country.

The memory of  the mother country is still strong , and  internet technology  has removed all barriers and distance.  So this world is now a big village, and no one is so  far to be reached. They  all can have access to the family they had left. But  now the older  generation is leaving us.

And I felt priviledged   to  have been able  to have a glimpse   of such moments. .

I the curious,   noticed  that everything was at its place and the little kitchen  was very clean and
well organised, to the honour  of her  old age.

Encouraged,   our Nona  led me to her little garden behind and discovered to me her treasures :
her brocolis, tomatoes, herbs, green peas and so on  and I was gratified with a full basket of vegetables, for which I was very grateful.

 On my left , a prune tree  was full of  ripe fruits .  Following my hungry gaze,she proudly
plucked one and gave it to me. It was the best prune , so sweet, juicy and delicious,
I realised that I had discovered some secret.

What  a  character !..., Her look was piercing. She missed nothing in a conversation.   I could not but laugh, remembering her face, her  chin,  her pinched lips, her searing eyes, how she refrained herself  in the presence of a lady babbling  things.  She  had to be polite in front of us, but felt ashamed
not to be able to  express herself clearly in english . The situation was really incongruous.

Now, I had to leave her  .  I thanked her for her kindness and with regret  bid her farewell.

It never occurred to me to write this article.  I do not possess enough information, and  our
Nona is so far away. I am not sure to be able to  meet her again.  

There was a moment of hesitation on my part, but on thought, I told myself that visit had to be
remembered, in memory of and to honour the courage of all the men and women who accept the hardship of being expatriated and strived to make their lives a success.


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NONO AND NONA

22 September 2017





Boys, N.. M. and Z.

At this time, you are still children  .   Papa and Mamma' presence  , your   soccer,  your  games ,
your days at  school ,   this is your  daily life.  You have no time to think about anything  else. It seems so natural to you  to have a Nono and Nona  to care for you and  bestow you  all the love you need. You are now enjoying a beautiful childhood and are unable to think that one day they will disappear , because  this is  the way of life itself and  it has a hidden meaning that you cannot understand now. The ties of love in your heart  have to grow  strong, without any obstacle,
so that one day  you  remember  and  are able to give love also .
This is the law of unconditional
love which makes this world a better world.

So many  youngsters, do not have these blessings.  You are privileged , reminder  this.

WHO IS YOUR NONA ?......

The years have left  no  wrinkles on her face because   she has  such a beautiful heart and mind.
Her beauty is natural , unaltered ,  it reflects what she is indeed.

Nona  has a fine chiseled face, heart shape, high cheek bones, a little nose, a thin mouth, long slanting grey  eyes  which she always keep  low as if she is following some inner thought or
some action she has to do. Her hair  is pale  blonde , thick  for her age ,  and  she  has it always
short  , of the same style.  Elegant and prude , humble but proud,  that is how I define her.

Very young,  at 18 years old, she stole the heart of  Nono, a handsome Sicilian, migrant himself.
A  photography of her on her wedding day  is hanging on the wall of   the living room..She was then  stunningly beautiful . I can understand why Nono refused to go back to his island with his family . Till now, you can see the love of Nono whenever  he looks at her.


              At this,   Nona just lowers her eyes as if nothing matters. She  then  had no words to
express herself.

Australia had just opened its borders to migrants . Both  were poor .  It was  too late  for them to attend any high school, so they could not afford any white collar job.   They had to acccept
whatever was offered to them.   Nono  obtained work  in  the market.  It was very hard for him, as every day, he rose at four o'clock  and  had to be there. But  for the love of his family, he did it.

What about Nona ?...  The salary of Nono was insufficient. With  other women in the same
situation , they joined together and start to sew drapers for babies in a garage. They did it for a few years, but  soon   pampers  came into  the market and they had to look for alternatives.

Now, with their savings,  Nono and Nona opened a  vegetable shop. They worked very hard,  and were  successful . They  could afford  to buy  their little  house , and were at ease for some time.

Around them, others did the same.  The Italian migrants started to do their  cheese, ham, sausages
and sell them . Every where,  little shops  opened  :   the butcher' shop,  the baker's shop,  the fish shop,  the grocery, the cake shop, the barber's shop..  As economy flourished, so fashion found its way. The seamstresses had lot of work and  import their magazines from Italy, Paris .

The road was busy  with all these people around, and  those were happy days when every body had an easier life., and started to relax.   Alas  !.. , it was too good to last, the big Sharks, found there an opportunity  to increase their riches, and wanted their shares of the boom.  They  opened everywhere big supermarkets.

This was a blow to the street  and the shop of Nono and Nona was next to one. They  had to close their shop and   to start over again.. Nona was pregnant of her third  child, time was pressing.

Nona  was a good cook.   She knows how to make  delicious pastries, cakes, stuffed  rolls .  So
they tried a snack bar.  Children after school, workmen  would come . She was very busy attending
to every body. Their situation improved,  but she was too tired.  She could no more.  Early in the morning, she had to wake up,  prepare  every thing, and  remain standing   for long hours.

During the day, her son and daughter stayed in a room downstairs. So  she had to do the stairs
every half hour  to see if they were ok.   It was very demanding.   Now  her legs were swollen.
As her time   to give birth approached, because of a larger family,  Nono and Nona had to take a difficult decision , they had to close the snack bar.

Luckily a parent of Nono who possessed a factory, offered him a job.  He  worked there up to his pension time. Nona  remained home to take care  of her children . Later, when those  were responsible enough,,  she went back to work in a vegetable shop  and had a trustworthy position.
There  she stayed until she was of age to be pensioned off.

Family is sacred for Nona, and up to now she is always  ready to give a helpful hand, whenever
asked for.  She would come to take the toddlers to the kindergarten and back. Every Friday,  Nona
would  prepare  schnilzels for  all the  family , she would go and  leave them at their place together with whatever  good  stuff she had in store. Her soups  and pastas are delicious with the meat balls which she herself  made , and there is always a big plate in the fridge at your place.  Her little children are never forgotten.

 She would suddenly appear with a cake, some pastry,  chocolates., all for your joy.   Though their meagre income ,  fruits are always available  on the table.  Nona knows how to choose them fresh.  You ,  boys  enjoyed.

Nono  himself knows  where to buy the best  meat, the best local wine and the latter is never missing on the table. Your grand parents   are warm people who
welcome   visitors   and make  them  feel at ease.   Nona  has always  some cheese  at her place, biscuits   for the hungry ones.

The time of coffee is sacred, and  Nona knows  the secret from her mother how to make  the
perfect one. The good  smell used to  pervade   the whole house and its environment.  I
myself could never refuse a second cup.

You boys, you know well, that there was never a day, you would not see your Nona.,
You were very demanding and spoiled , but   Nona  knew how to deal with you.
Dinner was ready , you had your juice and your little stomachs  could not complain.

 Remenber the days of " Thomas the Train.". For several years , Nono and Nona , had the custody
of the three  of you  after school and  they had their full ,  hearing   continuously   all the episodes
of the little train  and its songs. Yet they showed great patience, it was the price to pay for their
peace of mind.

 Poor Nono  had  to  let go his  beloved armchair to Noah, the little prince,  as well as his  best Italian chain on TV..   He had to  take refuge in the garage where he would  while away  time and give himself to his hobby : carpentry.   There he made benches,  small tables and other  little things for you.

Nono is not the talkative type, never intrusive, but is always ready to help. You can always count upon him .  There is none like him to take care of the little garden behind the house.  There he grows
green peas , brocholis,  tomatoes and  kitchen herbs. He knows  when to cut roses and how to treat
them.  Early in the morning, my daughter would see him  occupied in her garden,  removing  wild herbs, and taking  care of the plants, he himself had grown.

Nono and Nona were kind enough to give all of you  a place in their  home, while  alterations were being made to  your  house. This took much more time than expected. It was not easy for
them to give  up their room and bed for such a long time.  Sometime  two of you  would want  to sleep with your grandmother,   Nono would  then allow you to take his place near his beloved wife and he went to sleep in the godown.  He let you enjoy your grandmother 's presence.

Now, Nono and Nona have to sell heir house and they bought a smaller one so as to enjoy a
better income for  their old days. This last day at their place must have been very  hard for them,
to leave their home full of good memories .  But your papa and mama  were very touched ,
when you,  N.  and  M. took your bedcamp and  went to sleep at their place,  in their  bedroom
for the last time.  Surely,  you chatted a lot  before sleeping , so they did not have time to  be too
sad.

They  had resolved  to start anew their life in this  new place.   So they  had  new  furniture
around them and gave away what was not needed . They were  like  a  young couple.. We wish
them a happy retreat, as they  deserve it.

Before ending,  I wish to say something about the italian balls which  are  held regularly.
The old migrants have their club where they would regularly meet, and have society games.
Nono and Nona make it a must to attend to the balls , so as to meet their old friends. I once had
the priviledge of attending  one  and was very happy to be so welcomed.

 I like the tunes played by the  italian band .   They were romantic songs, waltz,  tangos ,  beautiful music that reminded them  of their  former youths.  Two  seniors  animated  the night with their violin.  It was a pleasure to watch all the ladies in their  elegant dresses and the men in their costumes gliding gravely on the floor.

I imagined what it cost them to be  in a new country,  to speak a new language,  to meet another culture, and adapt themselves. But they managed it and this ball  gathered every one of them, and
for a few hours they were allowed to live a dream , to remind  themselves of  their roots, and of  the members of their  family they  left  behind.  They  were able to share news about  them,  to speak about their villages,  and  new events  happening . It was  like a big family  gathering.

I was so happy to share these moments with them, but also was sad about the new generation who enjoys every thing their parents allow  them but are  unable to appreciate and share these pleasures
in their company.  These are precious moments, because they are the  last moments , last breaths
of a generation who sustained much hardship  to give them a better life. They ought  to give
them more time, to show compassion,  to listen to what they have to tell  , because they  have so much to share with  you , this   before it is too late.

A book was being closed, and  a new one  has been  opened.

You, boys will be able to think about every thing good you lived with Nono and Nona.
They are golden threads of your life and they show you the way. .  Nona always attends  her
Sunday mass.  She loves her Jesus dearly. Both your grandparents have been faithful to their
values.  They are examples for you.  Never forget them and pray for them.

Little grandmother
ARLETTE

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Dear BOYS

I never intended to write something about your Nono and Nona, but it came to me suddenly
that I could try.  I  regret not to be able to have  more stuff for my text because I am so far
and do not know if I shall be able to see them again. But, you one day, can add whatever you
have in your heart. make it more beautiful..

I myself  am just a passer by who want you to remember important things of your  little life.
I am so far from you. Although I spent the first six months caring for you,  I could not catch
up or were unable  to make myself more known and loved. I am  surely still a stranger to you.

I just hoped that later in life , you would wish to know more about   your family,
and will  take pleasure  in  reading  my writings.

Then  you will ask yourself one day  :  WHO WERE YOU, GRANDMOTHER ?....


ARLETTE.

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